I'm totally run out.

My emotions and everything, I raged so much over things, only now I'm totally out of steam. Not that there isn't plenty of rage left for me, just now all it does is sap my will to carry on.

Thats it.

Sil

Hello all,

I've got 2 rooms to let here £56 a week if you're on your own, £60 a week if you wanna share with someone (that's £60 between the two of you!)

I've had to ask the previous tenants to leave due to them wanting me to pay for them staying here. So please do not come here thinking I will not be wanting the money. I don't mind helping you or waiting, but i ain't a fucking charity.

Oh, and if you're on JSA or any kind of benefit, the council will most likely pay your rent. I'm alright waiting for the council to OK that as well.

First of all, we got the all clear news for my Dad. They got it, the got all the fucking tumors ^^

Its one hell of a relief.

Next....

I'm not sure how to say this lot but i'll try and stumble it along.

I've been a dick recently, letting my anger do the talking and totally rolling over some of the people who I called friends.... Now this is the delicate bit. I want to ask forgiveness for my behaviour, but I also want to ask for people to stop treating me with kid gloves.

I know I'm a childish idiot about things, especially being intimate. But I really need to be told no up front, not lied to and misled. Which is why I'm making this entry public this time. I want everyone to see that yeah, I've been a stupid dick, but not without some reasons.

AND I MEAN REASONS! There's no 1 person I'm saying its their fault cos although they helped upset me, in the end it was my own fault and my own anger, stupidity that got the better of me.

So its really a call to those who want an honest shot at friendship and I hope you think I'm worth the time and sometimes effort, that I unfortunately come with.

Dunno how else to say it I guess....

*edit* Actually, yeah I do. I know you're probably thinking that i'll just be a whinging whiney shit about all the past 'wrongs' but this is a clean slate i'm asking and offering to nearly everyone. But I'm an adult and I'm going to step up to that, as long as you treat me like one then I promise to try and take what comes like one, no more whinging, no more whimpering.